That’s what the Meyer’s Briggs test has ALWAYS given me.
I even tried to trick it one time by inputting my obscure answers – the choices that I MIGHT have picked. But the test is clearly the expert because I am swiftly sorted into my proper house, very appropriately titled, “the idealists.”
Now, please don’t misunderstand me. I am a proud INFP AND a proud Ravenclaw to boot. But when I first took the test as a teenager, it bothered me that I wasn’t put into the personality type associated with the label, “the performer.”
One of my mom’s favorite stories to tell about me as kid involves me matter-of-factly declaring that “Music IS my life!” While this declaration was indeed stated while I was choosing to sing instead of tidy up my room like my mom wanted me to, I feel the sentiment has held true for the past 26 years.
I don’t know how my three-year-old self knew that that call to sing would last well beyond the point that most people had set aside childhood dreams for more ‘practical’ pursuits. But she did. And I still listen to her all the time.
It was listening to her that moved me to spend all of my time on the playground on the swing set writing songs rather than making friends (Though I did eventually find friends who loved swinging as much as me!). It was listening to her that despite my shy, sweet nature in school got up and worked the hell out of James Brown’s “I Feel Good” all while wearing a red and black sequined outfit (which I still have by the way).
My three-year-old self is in fact one of the wisest people I know.
Because she knew that as an introvert, despite her strong stage fright, her deep connection to emotional context would help her get into character when she was feeling good like she knew that she would on that stage in elementary school. She knew that all that time alone was sculpting her into the songwriter that I now am- one that knows without a shadow of a doubt that if you lock me into a room for 30 minutes, I can come out with a fully written song.
I developed into the emotional, authentic performer I am today because of the rich, imaginative inner world I’ve always called home.
It is that place of understanding that has called me to help other performers as a creativity coach and teach them self-care because I know just how much I need that after a two hour show.
And as a Ravenclaw, I’m constantly craving new lessons. Those lessons can be desired in the form of experiences- which push me out of my comfort zone.
Yes, there are times I witness extroverts seem to effortlessly glide around the venue, shaking hands and quickly charming everyone so much that I wish I had their super powers.
Then I remember how good it felt the other night to hear a fellow introvert commend me on the one on one attention I manage to give an entire room of people when I play my songs.
We all have our strengths and weaknesses. The beautiful part about being whoever you happen to be is it doesn’t mean you are JUST the idealist or introvert, or JUST the performer, but a beautiful new thread of wherever you dare to tread.
You can be an ESFP idealist or an INFP performer. And I sure hope you are infusing your pursuits with everything that you are!