Whether you’re just starting to understand what being an introvert means – that we have a preference for gaining energy through time spent alone – or you’re a seasoned pro on the topic, there’s no denying that when anyone is talking about introversion, discussions about our energy always emerge.
So much so that this month’s entire issue of The Introvert Effect Magazine is centred around introverted energy.
Many people believe that introverts are at a disadvantage in society, always having to manage and deal with a possible lack of energy through time spent alone. So many people I talk to tell me that they’re overwhelmed and exhausted a lot of the time, mostly because their busy lives and jobs are taking up a lot of their energy. I 100% believe this, but I also think that a big percentage of the population in modern Western civilisation – introverts and extraverts alike – feel this way.
Why? Because that’s what we’re being sold everywhere we turn.
Busy-ness is a badge of honour.
There is a ‘hack’ for everything, and lots of people are making money selling them to suckers who think they need them.
We’ve kind of bought into a scarcity mentality, feeling like there’s never enough and that we, in particular, never have enough.
Being an introvert and feeling like you don’t have enough energy is simply just another variable in this equation. We’ve been constantly told that we don’t have enough energy, that the world is exhausting to us, and people are draining. But what if we’ve got it all wrong? What if it’s just SOME things/people/situations that drain us, not all of them? What if this has just become an excuse to hide behind?
I know you’re busy. Because let’s not forget that while ‘busy-ness’ has become admirable in our society, it’s also true. There’s a lot going on, especially if you have kids, a full time job, a business, and/or some semblance of a social life. Not to mention that the world is going to shit, according to the mass media, the environment is in turmoil, and even drinking your delicious coffee out of your favourite receptacle (the good old takeaway coffee cup) has become an environmental hazard.
Am I right?
Of course you’re exhausted.
So let’s take a step back and work out how you can get some more energy so that you can just make it through the week without having a breakdown on the bathroom floor (what is it with bathroom floors, B T Dubs? Why are they so inviting and soothing when you’re in the middle of a breakdown?)
This is not a hack, this is not a magic pill, and it’s certainly not going to solve all your problems, but here’s how you can start to improve your energy and feel like a respectable human again over the next three days.
DAY 1 – Where’s your energy going?
You don’t have to change anything today, there wont’ be a test at the end of the day. You just need to start paying attention to where your energy is going. Energy is a fuel source, just like food (or coffee), and if you’ve got more coming out than going in, you’re going to get hangry – or whatever the energetic equivalent is.
Energy is a pretty undefinable thing so let’s make this super easy.
// When your mind wanders, where does it go? Is it worrying about something that’s coming up, or rehashing an incident from earlier in the day? Are you thinking about someone who has upset you or who you’re concerned about? Every thought you have is sending energy SOMEWHERE. So start paying attention to that. If you’re giving energy to something (or someone) you can’t change, is it a valuable use of your time?
// What do you spend your day physically doing? Work, commuting in peak hour traffic, forced small talk with your colleagues, activities you hate that you allowed yourself to get talked into? What do you have to do in your day that makes you feel bad, or that you dread for hours (or even days) beforehand?
// Who’s messing with your energy? Is it someone you work with who you just get a weird vibe from? Is someone negative in your life who spews their negativity onto you and leaves you feeling completely drained? Or do you know someone who’s a strong and dominant personality who somehow always talks you into doing things you don’t want to do, or going along with them?
// Where else is your energy going? As you start to even pay attention to these things, you’ll start to see other areas your energy is going that aren’t really constructive or helpful. Like, when you get upset with a random stranger who cuts you off or is rude and it affects the rest of your day, or when you keep putting something off but it’s constantly in the back of your mind reminding you it needs to be done.
DAY 2 – What energises you?
Now that you can see areas in your life where your energy is being drained, today start to look for when you feel energised, positive, and happy.
// What activities or parts of your life feel light, joyful, and freeing? It could be a class that you take, or just getting up a little earlier each day before the rest of your house for some quiet time to yourself. If you struggle to answer this in your current life, what COULD feel like this to you?
// Who’s in your life that makes you feel energised when you spend time with them? The Internet might have you think that introverts don’t enjoy or get energy from interactions with other people, but I don’t believe this is true. We’re all SOME part extravert, even if it’s only a tiny part, and it’s possible to cultivate friendships, romantic relationships, and even family bonds that are energising and just wonderful. Who do you spend time with that feels effortless and fun? And, if you don’t have that right now, can you remember a time that you did? Who would you like to connect with who might help you feel this way?
// How can you bring more energising, high vibing people, activities, and rituals into your life so that you can start to crowd out any of the draining stuff we established yesterday? What will it take to find more of this? How can you be creative about feeling good, even if it’s doing things you’d normally dread or worry about?
DAY 3 – Supercharge your energy
If you haven’t started feeling energised and more positive after yesterday’s exercises, go back and repeat until you can start to feel excited and hopeful about bring more positive energy into your life and starting to reframe your thinking and your life to simply feel less exhausting.
This isn’t easy, it’s a pretty out there concept, especially if you’re just learning about this stuff, but it’s so important to just acknowledge your energy, where you’re at right now, where you’re sending energy, if it’s worthwhile and what you can do to feel more energised.
Some other things that you might feel helpful to start introducing into your life for today include:
// Carving out some quiet time for yourself to just chill in your own space – this is the number 1 way for introverts to gain more energy, so make it a priority!
// Working with a kinesiologist or other energy healer to align your energy and let go of any old (bad) habits, worries, or memories that are taking up space in your body.
// Exploring what else feels energising to you – we can get stuck in a bit of a rut and forget that there are new and exciting things to try and experience in life but sometimes we can close ourselves off from that. New friendships, physical activities, creative pursuits, or just about anything you can imagine. What’s something you’ve always wanted to try and never have? What feels a little scary but also a little bit exciting? Whatever comes to mind, give it a go and get an instant injection of energy.
Once you finish exploring Day 3, you could find yourself on a completely different trajectory! Who knows where simply giving these ideas and thoughts room in your life can take you.
I’ve always been a bit confused by the concept of energy, but it’s something that completely fascinates me and continues to surprise and amaze me. The more I explore it myself, the more my eyes are opened up to the reality that energy really is everything. It was so important to make Issue 2 centred around energy and the first Secret Society subscription box too. There are only a few days left to get access to the box and see for yourself.
Inside is an eBook I wrote called High Vibin’ and it’s all about understanding your introverted energy and uplevelling so that you can still be quiet, but you’re also vibrating at a positive and heightened frequency to bring new and wonderful opportunities into your life. There’s a bunch of other cool stuff in there as well, you can get it for a super special price until June 30, so head on over and check it out!
Make a commitment to yourself to spend the next three days intentionally paying attention to your energy and see what happens. Leave a comment below and let me know how you went, what you discovered, and if you learned anything about yourself that you’re going to change or try. And, as always, if this resonates, please share it with someone who you think would find it useful – the true Introvert Effect is how we are able to impact others just by passing ideas around in a way that is genuine and meaningful. Wouldn’t that be cool if this post helped someone you shared it with?